Yes, it would have to be me...I have to apologize, as I know some of you come here weekly for updates, or support, or camaraderie, or entertainment (!?)...and I have failed you! However, don't let this complete disappointment let you think I'm "off the wagon" again...I'm not!
Had an EXTREMELY long week this week, which actually made it a bit easier to really stick to the plan. On Wednesday I had the opportunity to meet Vicki Lawrence...
...here with Ric and me. She was in town for Bellevue Hospital's "Women's Night Out", which I was a part of. The entire experience - from the Expo beforehand to the dinner and presentation - was AMAZING. Not just for the "celebrity factor" of Vicki, but for the wonderful experience of all those women (and some men...FINALLY...), coming together to save Bellevue, and showing just how powerful of a force women can be when we work together! THOUSANDS of dollars were raised, and there were so many wonderful exhibitors at the Expo - from hair and makeup to health and wellness, it was all there, and all for women! How proud I was to be part of it!
BUT, and this is a BIG but (like mine...though shrinking...), there was a challenge: dinner. Prior to the event we had to RSVP with our dinner choice: chicken or vegetarian. Either was probably a safe bet, so I went with chicken. I felt relieved when I saw the vegetarian plate come out to the woman next to me: it was some kind of ravioli, doused in a cream sauce. Surely my chicken choice would be more healthful. RATS! Foiled again!
As they placed the steaming plate in front of me, I faced quite the conundrum...I was positively famished from the long day, but the breaded, sauteed, and oil/butter soaked chicken breast was, shall we say, less than a healthful selection. The veggies (carrots and 3 spears of asparagus) were also sauteed, and the steaming, creamy, gorgeous-looking mashed potatoes stared back at me and whispered "Oooh you're sooooo gonna love me...especially with this extra little pat of butter so gingerly placed on my head..."
It was all delicious (you didn't think I was gonna go hungry did you???), but I made my way around the plate with the precision of a nutritionist! I peeled the breading off, and ate half the chicken breast (it was enormous!), ate all the veggies, and even had about a quarter of the potatoes (and...I might add, they were right...). For dessert, there was a piece of berry cheesecake placed in front of each one of us. Again, do you really think I wasn't going to enjoy that with the rest of my table-mates? Well, I did...but I only had one bite. And honestly, that's all I needed. I wasn't hungry anymore, I just wanted the TASTE. I got the taste, and I was done!
I don't know if it was being in the presence of all those strong and dignified women, but I felt SO EMPOWERED that night. I had triumphed! Ok, so it was a triumph over cheesecake...it was still a triumph!!! :) I can't tell you how good it feels to finally have some control over this - over food - after all these years of being it's slave. Before, I would most certainly feel deprived - even punished - if I had attempted to sit through a dinner and watch other people wholf down 800 calories. Now, I just felt....empowered. In control. Proud.
Next weigh in is Monday...I was down 25 pounds last week. Of course, we are rapidly approaching my monthly water weight weeks. I'll admit, that does get me down. But not enough to give up that control...that pride. I'll keep you posted!
Till next time,
~L
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